Lunch Break

What you should know:

1. Picnics are one of my favourite ways to eat. 
2. I'm easily duped. 

I know you'll find this hard to believe but when I was wee, I didn't have much of an appetite. I picked at my food like a bird and never felt much like eating. At lunchtimes, my mum would make me up a plate with a little bit of this and a little bit of that to try and encourage me. I don't even remember having a favourite food. 

Fast forward 40+ years and I've got what you would describe as a healthy appetite. Pretty much everything is my favourite food but especially chocolate, noodles, halloumi, hummus, all cheese, peanut M&Ms, cheese and onion pasties, scones and Doritos. But not all on the same plate because that would be weird. 

Scones! 

Even now, I like a picnicy lunch or tea when you put tasty treats on the table and keep picking at them until nobody can move. The trouble is, Ivie knows this and used this knowledge for nefarious purposes. 

I don't work Fridays and I often just pootle about drinking tea, reading and playing with the puppy. Ivie also knows this. One Friday a couple of weeks ago, Ivie was going to row up silage at the next door farm. As he was getting ready to leave, he said, "maybe we could have a picnic for lunch."

"What a great idea," I thought to myself, "I'll see how the drinking tea/reading/puppy entertaining is going and decide at lunchtime." Ivie exited stage left. 

After he'd gone, I noticed his lunch box on the table. Sans lunch. 

What Ivie said: "maybe we could have a picnic for lunch." 

What Ivie meant: "I haven't actually made any lunch for myself and if you don't make me any I won't have anything to eat today. Oh woe is me. So, you'll have to make me lunch, walk along the cycle path, through a couple of fields (uphill) in the midday sun and I'll take a 15 minute break to eat it with you. Then you can come home again."

And because I'm such a good girlfriend that's what I did. And Ivie's sister in law did the same for his brother, who I'm sure was much more direct. We set off with two picnics and two dogs and had a grand outing. And luckily for Ivie, it was a pretty good view.