They're all going on a summer holiday

Things I've learned

1. Farmers are adept at diversification. 
2. I like salted caramel ice cream. I was pretty sure of that already but it's always good to check these things. 

I've been thinking a lot about holidays this week. It's partly the weather - which has been scorchio - and partly the increase in traffic on the roads. 

Dumfries and Galloway is a region that relies heavily on tourism. According to Visit Scotland, British travellers alone made over 750,000 overnight trips to the region in 2018, spending 2.5 million nights and £141 million. 

Of course, this is a mixed blessing. It means that when we have visitors ourselves, there are plenty of places and events to take them to. But we've also all come across drivers either braking for every bend (or puddle, which was my particular favourite) or going far too fast on single track roads and overtaking on blind corners on the A75. 

It's not quite the onslaught that Edinburgh usually has every year. When I lived there, I really enjoyed the fact that I passed Edinburgh Castle on my morning bus route and that I could walk to some of the best art galleries in the world but it made going about my day to day life in August absolute hell. It's certainly experiencing a quieter summer this year due to covid cancellations and, although that has a massive impact on businesses that rely on festival audiences, I'm sure there are many that are breathing a sigh of relief and enjoying the quieter streets. 

Gallery of Modern Art, Edinburgh

Which brings me back to D&G and the farm. Before I lived here, the tourism sector was something I only really thought about in a work setting. Having worked for Spring Fling and the Wigtown Book Festival in the past, I've been involved in a lot of audience surveys, reports to funders and the like but it all felt a bit more abstract. 

Spittal Sunset
Photo by Ivie

Now the view from my bedroom window includes the two holiday cottages on the farm and if I'm sitting outside I can hear people on the cycle path and the gates opening and closing. 

I really like it. I love living somewhere that other people want to come and visit and it stops me taking these glorious views for granted. A friend of mine came to visit last week from Wiltshire and stayed in a nearby AirBnB (Spittal Cottages were both booked!). Her and her children arrived one drizzly, overcast afternoon and woke up the next day surrounded by the Galloway Hills and Galloway Forest Park. They were all captivated by the views, the wildlife and the peace and quiet. It was great to see the place through their eyes and it made me fall in love with D&G a little bit more, if that's possible. 

Photo by Julia

While they were here, we went to Cream o' Galloway on a sunny Saturday. It was my first major trip into the outside world since mid-March so it was all slightly strange. But as numbers were limited to enable social distancing it meant that it was quiet, we barely had to queue for ice cream (salted caramel since you ask) and the kids could explore the adventure playground and go karts till their heart's content. 

It reminded us of a previous visit around six years ago when they'd come to Auchencairn to stay with me. As we waited for the tractor ride (little did I know I'd be able to do that every day if I wanted in a few year's time), the chap said, "now remember that we'll be driving through a working farm. There will be machinery and equipment lying around." We thought he meant from a health and safety point of view and keeping the children safe. "We've had complaints from visitors that the place looks untidy." I'm not often speechless...

Living with an Extrovert

 Things you should know:

1. I am an introvert.
2. Ivie is not.
3. There's more than one sweeping generalisation coming up.

There are lots of definitions of introverts and extroverts out there. Without getting too detailed, one of the main differences is how they recharge their batteries: introverts get their energy back from being on their own; extroverts by being surrounded by people. 

It's one of the reasons that I enjoyed the time that I lived on my own so much and thought I'd never want to live with anyone Ever Again. 

In some ways, being an introvert farmer's WAG is the perfect set-up, though. I have the house to myself for hours at a time and am (just about) ready for company when Ivie gets home. This is what usually happens:

In Ivie's case, it involves putting on the radio, wandering to his desk, scrolling through Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat and WhatsApp on his phone while watching tractor porn on the computer all at the same time. I whimper quietly while switching off the radio, shutting the kitchen door and just about coping with the noise of the kettle. 

One of the ways this difference shows up between us is when we're socialising. Those of you that know Ivie will know that he's usually the last to leave any party. You know when they 'subtly' turn on the lights and wash the floor? Ivie will still be chatting away to someone he's known for 30 years or 30 minutes and having the time of his life. I'll have peaked early and retreated hours ago and will also be having a grand old time. And a cuppa. 

Rock n roll introvert style

It doesn't mean I didn't enjoy myself or that I didn't like the people I met, it's just that I ran out of steam before he did. And Ivie gets it. He doesn't try to change me or make me feel guilty for always being pretty much the first to leave. 

Anyway, Ivie's best mate had a big birthday this week (yes, Marcus turned 21). For various reasons, I managed to miss both of his celebrations but it meant that Ivie could see everyone he'd missed during lockdown all in one go - extroverts are very efficient in this way. 

While lockdown and shielding wasn't too bad for me because of my introvert tendencies, it does mean that getting out into the outside world is taking me a bit longer. It's a noisy, overwhelming place for someone who only saw people with the surname Fisher for four-and-a-half months. Great as they are, I'm looking forward to broadening my socialising horizons over the coming weeks and months. See you there.

PS thanks to the people I haven't met yet who are regular readers 😊

Everybody was Multi-tasking

What I've learned:

1. Everyone around here has more than one skill
2. Farmers' skills involve hitting things with a hammer

We've been having our bathroom refitted this week. It's been a long time coming. We started talking about it before Christmas then finally got round to ordering everything in March. Then lockdown happened. And shielding was extended. So, we've now got a beautiful, almost finished bathroom. 

Work in progress

We've been really lucky with the guy that's doing it for us. Technically, he's a joiner but he's done the plumbing, plastering, as well as the joinery work and fitting the new window. I know everyone knows everyone around here but it makes things so much easier because you're not just opening the Yellow Pages (yes, I'm showing my age) and choosing someone random that a) might turn up when they say they're going to and b) might do a good job. 

You're allowed to be excited about new windows when you're over 40

Along the way, I've learned that farmers are also mult-talented. I've mentioned before that I didn't really know what Ivie did all day. Aside from complicated mental arithmetic, Ivie spends his day problem-solving and fixing things. His days rarely finish up as planned due to any number of unforeseen circumstances involving the weather, temperamental machinery, animals escaping, animals dying, animals giving birth, or any combination thereof. In a lot of cases - animals notwithstanding - these circumstances are 'moulded' with the aid of a heavy object and a lot of force. 

Talking of multi-tasking, something I noticed when I first moved to Dumfries and Galloway is that a lot of people have more than one job. Their week might be made up of two or three part-time jobs or they might make money from their arts and crafts skills over and above the 9-5. In some circles, it would be called a 'portfolio career' but for normal people, it's just life. Before I lived here, I'd always worked full-time without questioning it and it was the norm amongst my friends. In fact, the people I knew who didn't work full-time outside the home generally had small children. 

As I've got older, I've really appreciated time over almost everything else and, aside from a six-month blip in a job that wasn't right for me, I've worked part-time since December 2013, often made up of two or more contracts. It was a great way to get to know more people, too. My first part-time contracts were with Spring Fling and Wigtown Book Festival, two of my favourite D&G cultural icons. I got to know a lot of people who are now close friends and I might have bumped into someone special at the 2017 book festival opening party...

Going back to the bathroom, I did get slightly confused by the multi-talented joiner earlier in the week. He mentioned that he would only be there the next morning as he had a funeral in the afternoon. I made my, "oh I'm sorry" face but didn't have time to say anything else as he had already moved on to telling me what else he still had to do. Later, as I watched the van leave down the farm road, I saw the tell-tale words on the back doors, "Ian Broll. Joiners and Funeral Directors". 

A Time and a Place

Things you should know:

1. I'm learning
2. You've got to have a strong stomach for this lark

Yesterday, Ivie had to calf a cow. For those unfamiliar with cows, they're usually pretty good at getting on with it themselves but sometimes they need a bit of extra help. This one was a heifer (which means it was its first calf*), and sometimes they need quite a lot of... let's call it intervention. 

Mind you, I'm getting the hang of asking the right questions at the appropriate time:

• is the calf up on its feet?
• is the cow letting it sook?
• did they have to milk the cow and bottle feed the calf? 

Yesterday was a new one on me, though. Without going into too much detail - partly because I can't remember all the ins and outs (as it were) and partly cos it's a bit brutal - this birth involved a lot of jiggery pokery and something called a calving jack to get the wee blighter out. 

Protective Mama

Ivie, on the other hand, did remember all the details and thought the lunch table was a good time and place to recount them all. I wasn't so sure, especially as it was followed by a chat about a dung spreading machine that Ivie and his brother were going to look at that afternoon. 

If someone had told me three years ago that these would be topics of conversation with my significant other I don't think I'd have believed them. Other recent topics include:

• why some farms wrap their bales 4 times and others 6 
• sperm testing of bulls
• the merits of owning vs hiring farm machinery

Bales wrapped 4 times

Sometimes I like lunchtimes when we just talk about what's for tea.

* I haven't quite worked out how the word 'heifer' has entered normal day language to describe someone who's overweight. Suggestions welcome.

Pros and No Cons

Things you should know: 
There are more advantages than disadvantages

I moved to Dumfries and Galloway at the end of 2013 after more than 20 years living in cities including Edinburgh, Glasgow and Wellington, NZ. There's really very little I miss about city life. 

• I used to spend over an hour every morning and evening travelling 10 miles each way on the number 25 bus. Now, it's a 3 minute drive into the village or a 3 second walk to my homeworking desk.
• There were people everywhere, especially in Edinburgh in August. The memories of trying to get to the bank in my lunch hour still raise my blood pressure.  
• I didn't know any of my neighbours. When I first moved to Auchencairn, my neighbours all introduced themselves within 20 minutes of my arriving and post like this used to arrive without any problem. 

There's very little about country - or farm - life that makes me grumble. Occasionally, I feel like being able to walk to a restaurant, cinema or exhibition but then I remember all the great things about living where I do. 

• Through Ivie I have an extended adopted family who have been welcoming and wonderful, especially during lockdown. 
• The noisiest thing I usually hear all day is bulls bellowing at each other. 
• People bring us things all the time, like carrots and cabbages for us to plant or juicy raspberries from their garden. 

No shortage of planters around here

One of things I'll never tire of is the view from The Spittal. There are views from the top of the farm that only a handful of people have ever seen. Those of you who know Ivie will know about his Instagram posts with the hashtag #anotherboringview. It's true that he takes it slightly for granted but I think he's appreciating it a little bit more as I get to know my new surroundings. 

It makes every day more than a little bit better. I reckon I'll stay for a while 😉

One Woman and Someone Else's Dog

Things I learned today:

1. You've got to keep sheep moving.

2. They are stupider than I thought.

Things I already knew:

1. I love Isa. 

I've had a pretty busy day. It was another one of those instances where I said, "yes" without giving it nearly enough thought. Anyone else detecting a theme?  

It's been a bit of a tough week. I've been really fed up with lockdown now that it's starting to relax more for the general population. The freaks like me  people shielding are still only allowed to meet people outside and have other (very kind) people do their shopping, which is a pain in the bahookie. 

So, when Ivie suggested I go and help him and Drew (his nephew) this morning, I jumped at the chance, especially as Isa the collie was also invited. 

The three humans set off for the top of the farm on the quad bike with Isa snapping at the wheels. This is a collie pastime, apparently, and worries me greatly but Ivie assures me that she gets out the way if you just keep driving. So far so true.... 

Isa is a working-dog-in-training. She's great at keeping a big group of sheep together at the edge of a field, running from one side to the other bringing in any stragglers. What she's not quite mastered yet is figuring out which direction the humans are trying to drive them. Eventually the sheep were in an enclosure and Ivie and Drew set up various fences and gates to form a wide entrance that narrowed to a single lane. At this point, Isa and I watched on, neither of us very sure what was happening or what we'd be doing next. 

It turns out that Isa, Drew and I had to separate off smaller groups of about 15 lambs and ewes and Drew operated a 'guillotine gate' (which is just as it sounds) to direct them down the corridor (or 'race') to a weigh scale. Ivie weighed the lambs, separating the ones heavy enough to go to market this week and let the ewes straight through. We probably did this half a dozen times then went for lunch. 

At one point one of the ewes decided to stick its head between the gate post and the wall and get it stuck. It didn't wriggle or bleat or look alarmed. It just stood there staring straight ahead as if to say, "Looks like I'm stuck. Think I'll face this way for a while". Freeing it involved Drew holding its head and Ivie lifting its body so that it could get its head out the gap it had stuck it in. Stupid animal. 

After lunch, Drew went off to mow his grandparents' grass so we collected Isa and headed back to the enclosure where we'd left the sheep. I was thinking we'd be taking them back to their field and then heading back home for a nice cup of tea and a sit down. 

But they still needed dipped. I had visions of them being dunked in a sunken tank and hauled out the other side. Thankfully, it just involved repeating what had been done this morning with the separating and the groups and the guillotine for Ivie to spray them with blue stuff down their backs. The only difference was that Drew wasn't there to open the gate, separate the sheep, close the gate, operate the guillotine gate and keep hold of Isa. Or take them back to their field and bring the next 150 over three fields to do it all over again. 

Isa and I had pretty much got the hang of it by the time we'd moved our 300th sheep. 

We were awarded a B+ for our efforts, which I think isn't bad. I have been rewarded with Spittal beef for tea followed by chocolate torte from Saucy Desserts and I'm just waiting for my Crafty gin to be poured. It's so important to shop local, don't you think.... 

Flitting and Stripping

What you should know:

• if you keep reading you'll see a photo of Ivie stripping

Ivie has had two addresses in his life; I'd had two by the time I was 8 months old. I've moved house twice in the last year come to think of it (it made sense at the time, honest). 

I've been thinking about moving house this week - not that I'm planning on doing it again anytime soon. But we're getting ready for a new bathroom so have been taking down shelves and stripping wallpaper and there's now that strange echo that you get when you start to pack boxes prior to a move. 

Move 1, July 2019

Move 2, Dec 2019

Housing on farms is something that seems quite complicated if you haven't grown up in that environment. For example, Ivie's two addresses have been the farmhouse (where he grew up) and the farm cottage (where we live now). It takes less than a minute to walk between the two so he's never had to bother setting up mail redirection. 

When Ivie's brother and sister-in-law got married they moved into the cottage. So far, so straightforward. When their third child was on the way, they moved into the farmhouse. That's when Ivie moved into the cottage. The end. 

Except it's not the end. If one of Ivie's nieces or his nephew decide to make their life on the farm, they'll probably move into the cottage so we'll move out. And if later they have a growing family, they'll probably move into the farmhouse, meaning Ivie's brother and sister-in-law will move out. And so the merry-go-round continues. 

It sounds harsh from the outside looking in but it's practical and follows the circle of life, a bit like farming itself. 

I used to think that would make me feel quite insecure and transient about where I lived but the old adage about home being where the heart is, is absolutely true. We're middle-aged so we're looking forward to choosing paint colours and flooring and have been saying things like, "it'll be so much easier to keep clean". 

Decorating doesn't feel like a waste of time because this is the home we're building together today. I could repeat all sorts of cliches about living in the here and now but it's something that kind of happens on the farm anyway. Every day is a new day and, although what happens today has an impact on the future, none of it is set in stone. 

For instance, Ivie is supposed to be at silage on another farm today but it started tipping down as soon as he got there so he'll head back and find another job that needs doing. Like stripping wallpaper. 

Two Baths Fisher